Yes, my exams are in a week's time and look what am I doing here. Due to my wrecked state of mood, I did not get a SINGLE work done today despite getting only 5 hours of sleep the night before, waking up at 7am and the fact that it's almost 3 am now. Great. 20 Hours being awake doing nothing, or rather, feeling in the dumps. The latter is an awful feeling. And it doesn't help when you're already feeling tired from the past few weeks and closing up to being unwell. With an acne breakout to boot! URGH.
For the past 2 weeks, I had my Foundation Clinical Skills which I really thought was a disgust. Lack of coordination and organisation on the varsity's part and more so, the hospitals, where some people actually got to learn loads, and there are those like me, who learnt minimal. The last day was rather cool though, being able to write doctors' notes - but only because there weren't any other doctors in the ward to accompany the consultant! But man, things here work quite nicely on the outside and the extent which I have seen. I do ponder how things are like back home in Malaysia. Perhaps I should try to ask for permission to attend a week's attachment back in Malaysia - AGAIN. Just to get a feel of it now that I know more about what's going on. Of course, it would be a nightmare to put my national language to good use again. Fluency has been jeopardised by the lack of usage and upkeeping.
Sigh, I really do wish that the day wasn't like this. I really hate it. Why can't I be happy? I am happy over the littlest things. Then again, I can get upset over little things. It's always the little things that matter most. Sigh, perhaps the things were too little to be seen and therefore not paid much attention to. There were few good moments that happened, but all vanished when thoughts were recollected. Suppression is not the way to go, but it happens. And sometimes, you just can't find any other way.
Snapshots from the valleys, both nice and dull days.
6 comments:
Everything happens for a reason.
A seemingly disorganized programme could actually be a valuable experience to us. So next time we will appreciate well-organized activities more; and if we are given the duty to organize similar events, we will know what ought to be done and what ought to be avoided.
Since you are stressed, u tend to see things in a more negative way. Perhaps slping for 20 hrs in a day was ok for u during non-exam period but it is now your biggest vice as you need time for your revision. Just think in this way: we can revise better after a good rest. The more you worry about the time, the lesser time will be left for you (since you spent too much time worrying). So dun worry, just study! =)
Why can't you be happy? I had been asking myself the same question over the past few months. And let me tell you this, you can only be happy when you stop asking yourself this and start thinking on 'how to be happy?'.
So how?
Do what you love. If you can't, then love what you do.
yeah, it was an experience. it did teach me how to appreciate organised events more and also, to understand that shortcomings do occur in life. Nothing's perfect. We can only try our best to be as perfect as can be. Then, we are all individuals whose taste and preferences might not be quite similar. We all have the Diversity(D) gene segments in us rite? ;) "why can't i be happy" is perhaps a phrase indirectly diffused by your influence wk. but yes, i sure do hope such positive thinking of yours will diffuse quickly enough as well! =)
=P
Haha... That influence was an unwanted side effect, tat's y i quickly provided an 'antidote' to you here!
Hehe~
Hmmm....y so unhappy~~ Cheer up! You've got some really gorgeous pics here!! Wish I could see such breathtaking views with my own eyes (*_*) Menangis aku! =þ
clear blue BLUE skies with distinct white fluffy clouds are a rarity over here. RARE. but it comes by once more often in summer. and it's beautiful. am sure there are wonderful scenes wherever you are as well anony. just need to open eyes and be more sensitive...well, either that, or just stare into a mirror. *wink* ;)
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